Memorial delay: Pandemic scotches plans after passing
Patriot Guard Riders at the National Cemetery of the Alleghenies, Nov. 6, 2020
Harry Funk/Observer-Reporter
James Funk puffs on a favorite pipe on his 86th birthday, May 26, 2019.
Harry Funk/Observer-Reporter
National Cemetery of the Alleghenies, Cecil Township
Wedding of Elizabeth Clark and James Funk, Coventry Church of the Brethren, Chester County, April 2, 1960
The call was expected.
A few days previously, my father’s hospice caregiver had told me to start making arrangements with a funeral director, and I promptly did so.
Still, when I got the word just before midnight on Feb. 10, 2020, I reacted pretty much as anyone would.
James Funk was three-and-a-half months away from his 87th birthday, but the big date approaching for him was April 2, the 60th anniversary of his marriage to my mother, Elizabeth. He had been talking excitedly about the occasion for quite a while, and we were planning to have relatives visit their home at the Grand Residence at Upper St. Clair to celebrate.
As we sat waiting in their apartment for the immediate needs to be taken care of in the early hours of Feb. 11, my mom had the idea for everyone to visit as planned, except it would be for a memorial service.
Meanwhile, my dad always had intended to be cremated. So our plan was for him to be laid to rest the same day at the National Cemetery of the Alleghenies, as he was a veteran of the U.S. Army who served in Korea.
In mid-February, medical experts were warning about a new virus that had the potential to cause major problems. I, for one, wasn’t worried. COVID-19 seemed like it would be similar to, say, avian influenza in terms of impact. We’d hear about it for a while and then proceed with life as usual.
A few weeks later, my mother’s sister called to say that she and her husband would be unable to visit because of their concerns about the coronavirus. Then other relatives began to relay similar messages. So we took a wait-and-see approach as far as going through with anything on April 2.
On March 12, I stopped by the Grand Residence to drop off some items for my mom. The front door was locked, and once someone let me inside, I had my temperature taken and was asked several questions, the ones that since have become routine, about how I was feeling, if I had traveled recently and if I’d been around anyone who displayed the common symptoms associated with COVID-19.
I haven’t been inside my mother’s apartment since.
She was supposed to move from the suite she shared with my father to a smaller unit, but that has yet to occur.
So, of course, has a memorial service.
We waited, month after month, for a green light that never came. She particularly held out hope that, somehow, my father’s loved ones would be able to gather and pay their respects.
Finally, we decided that we had waited long enough.
In late October, I spoke with the folks at Beinhauer Family Services about completing what we’d started eight-plus months beforehand, and we scheduled my father’s ashes to be placed in a National Cemetery columbarium on the Friday before Veterans Day.
Two days before that, I had been invited by Jim Shaw, Region 12 senior ride captain for Region 12 of the Patriot Guard Riders – Pennsylvania, to attend a Moment of Remembrance at the same cemetery. Regional members of the nationwide group gather there at 9 a.m. the first Wednesday of each month to honor veterans who had been laid to rest without receiving military honors.
I mentioned to Jim that I’d be returning later in the week, and he immediately said that he and his fellow riders would like to do so, as well, on my father’s behalf.
So they did, on two days’ notice, forming a procession at Beinhauer’s in Peters Township to accompany us to the cemetery. Once there, they stood at attention for a brief service, and bugler Ray Zimmerman put a special mark on the proceedings by playing “Taps.”
Plus the Patriot Guard Riders presented me with a U.S. flag from the president and a plaque that reads:
“May your pain be tempered by the knowledge that James R. Funk, U.S. Army/Korean War veterans, is a true American hero.”
That was unexpected.
And after the delay in my father reaching his final resting place, what the riders did for him is something for which I always will be grateful.