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I want to ride my (e)bicycle, bicycle, bicycle…

By Harry Funk 3 min read
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Helmet? I don’t need no stinkin’ …

Hold on a second, Slick. Sure, no one would think of wearing a bicycle helmet back in your day. But that was when people sort of could pretend that cigarettes weren’t so bad for them.

We’re much smarter now, at least as far as safety is concerned.

And so for the first time ever, probably, I strapped on the requisite headgear in anticipation of riding a bicycle. And not just any bike. This was the one of my preteen dreams, a model with plenty of extra get-up-and-go for those steep hills, final miles and general laziness.

My hike was on an eBike, kindly supplied for my edification by Adam Rossi, owner of South Fayette Township company ASR – that stands for both Adam Solar Resources and Adam Solar Rides – so that I could write about the latest in pedal-powered transportation.

Yes, an electric bike has pedals, just like the coveted Schwinns with banana seats that the cool kids rode. So you physically fit folks can give your legs as much of a workout as you want without engaging the little motor that can.

For we mid-50s types whose idea of a workout is lifting the proverbial mug of suds, more power to us.

The eBike’s power comes simply from charging the motor through a 120-volt outlet for a few hours. Then it’s, if you’ll pardon the expression, off to the races.

”If you get nervous, just hold the brake,” Adam advises me, after I’d managed to lift my leg high enough to get it over the crossbar while thinking how much better a girl’s bike would have worked for that. Holding the brake would cut power to the motor, thus sparing me injury or, more importantly, further embarrassment.

Oops. My initial attempts with the throttle landed me in a rut full of mud. Sorry about those tires, Adam.

But memories of riding my dad’s Kawasaki as an unfazeable teenager quickly got me used to having the motor move me.

“Whee!”

I actually verbalized that emotion a few times as Adam and I took a spin along Mayview Road, to the bemusement of motorists who had to wonder about a couple of bozos out on bikes with the temperature in the mid-20s.

But, hey, those helmets aren’t just for safety. They help keep your noggin nice and toasty.

The machine I was riding, a California-built brand called IZIP, was equipped with a speedometer and rear-view mirror, neither of which I dared glance at as I kept my eyes focused straight ahead. As a result, I had no idea how fast I was going, nor that a GMC apparently had slowed to a crawl behind me as we turned back into ASR’s parking lot – so I missed a certain derogatory digit that the driver probably pointed in my direction.

But I survived! And I have something for my Christmas/birthday/Dad’s Day list. The eBikes start at around $1,000, so why not outfit the Old Man?

Just kidding, family. Keep those Jerry Garcia neckties coming!

Meanwhile, I’m gearing up to try a new product that Adam plans to offer: an eSkateboard.

Just kidding, family. Not even a helmet would save me from that experience. n

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